yeah yeah i know

another post in one day...i need to think and get stuff out...and this is where i shall do it

im starting to miss little things about high school...not the problems but just little things...like how i could pretty much do anything there...i never felt weird about being there...i feel weird about being at Mal sometimes...i've grown up a lot since high school...ask Nabil ... we were talking about it the other day at the mall...it was good to talk to him and resolve some problems that we kinda had...we never really got along...well scrach that...i never really got along with people...i went through a lot when my dad was still at home...it was hell to come home to him drunk and bitching about something...im sorry to all those who i went to school with...they never really knew...well im sure they could see it in my face...and im sure some of them were smart enough to realize somethings...like how i got suspended on the day my dad moved out...or how after that date i slowly changed...i let Emma-leigh in...before then i dont think i really did...my heart was elsewhere...i was somewhere i couldnt reach it...i didnt want to hurt anymore...i just wanted to trust people and to have someone there for me no matter what...my dad was never there...so i looked to guys...but i went about it all wrong...i dont know how to describe it...i was really different then...

i may or may not add more to this...i have to go for now...