i dont even know what i am feeling right now. it is kinda like i used to feel when i was...you know...depressed..but not exactly like it was but like it was just before all that crap went down. it sucks to know it is coming and not being able to stop it. like the calm before the storm. the breath before the plunge. the...i dont know.... i just wish it would end. leave me in peace. i just wan to be left alone. maybe not be around people anymore. just for a little while. not too long but just so i can get bakc to me for awhile. anyhoos not too long till nationals...